did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
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