check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
