i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Randomize
