My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
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