You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I skipped work to stalk him.
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
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