ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
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Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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