She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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