I molested 6 butterflies tonight
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
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