what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Randomize