and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
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