oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Randomize
