i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Boobs are out for the taking
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
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