Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
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I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
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Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
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