Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
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