So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
