he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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