Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
