I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
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