i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Randomize
