I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
