hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
