so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
Will exercising make me less horny?
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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