I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
Randomize
