I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
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