Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
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