i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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