You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
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It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
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I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
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