No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
