Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
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