im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
