He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Randomize
