girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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