so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
The Olympian is in my bed
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
