i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
should my penis look like a turkey
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
Randomize
