Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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