My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
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