and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
Randomize
