A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass