Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
When did we convert life to cartoon?
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
