I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Randomize