If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
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