Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
Randomize
