who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
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