sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
If I die, sorry about rent.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
