he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
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