susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Randomize
