Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
Randomize
