Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
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