i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
