I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
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