Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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