I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
He better not be in your backpack
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
Randomize
